The science of falling in love_Shannon Odell

The science of falling in love

 

Love is often described as heartwarming, heart-wrenching and even heartbreaking. So, what does the brain have to do with it? Everything! The journey from first spark to last tear is guided by a symphony of neurochemicals and brain systems.

我们常常把爱描述为暖心的、 令人心痛的，甚至是令人心碎的。 那大脑和它有什么关系呢？ 息息相关！ 从第一丝火花到最后一滴泪的旅程， 由神经化学物质和脑系统共同奏响。

 

As you begin to fall for someone, you may find yourself excessively daydreaming about them and wanting to spend more and more time together. This first stage of love is what psychologists call infatuation, or passionate love. Your new relationship can feel almost intoxicating, and when it comes to the brain, that’s not far from the truth. Infatuated individuals show increased activation in the ventral tegmental area. The VTA is the reward-processing and motivation hub of the brain, firing when you do things like eat a sweet treat, quench your thirst, or in more extreme cases, take drugs of abuse. Activation releases the “feel good” neurotransmitter dopamine, teaching your brain to repeat behaviors in anticipation of receiving the same initial reward. This increased VTA activity is the reason love's not only euphoric, but also draws you towards your new partner.

你开始对某人动心的时候， 你会发现自己整天都在想他/她， 想和他/她待得更久一点。 爱的第一阶段 被心理学家称为“热恋”， 或者激情之爱。 这段新的感情会让你如痴如醉， 从大脑来看， 也差不多确实是这个情况。 热恋中人们的中脑腹侧被盖区 （VTA）会更加活跃。 VTA 是大脑中 处理奖赏和激励的中枢， 会在你吃甜品、畅饮一番 或者更极端一点， 在你滥用药物的时候兴奋起来。 激活的过程会释放神经递质多巴胺， 让你感到“好爽”， 训练你的大脑得出 重复这些行为 可以收获同样的奖励的思维。 VTA 更活跃的活动 让爱不仅令人愉悦， 也会让你被你的新伴侣吸引。

 

At this first stage, it may be hard to see any faults in your new perfect partner. This haze is thanks to love’s influence on higher cortical brain regions. Some newly infatuated individuals show decreased activity in the brain’s cognitive center, the prefrontal cortex. As activation of this region allows us to engage in critical thought and pass judgment, it’s not surprising we tend to see new relationships through rose-colored glasses.

第一阶段，你可能很难看清 你那完美的新伴侣有什么缺点。 这团迷雾来源于 爱在大脑高级皮质区产生的影响。 有些刚坠入爱河的人， 他们大脑的认知中心， 即前额皮层， 出现了活跃性降低的现象。 由于这个区域的激活 可以让我们辩证地思考， 做出判断， 我们会透过粉红泡泡 看待新感情也就不奇怪了。

 

While this first stage of love can be an intense rollercoaster of emotions and brain activity, it typically only lasts a few months, making way for the more long-lasting stage of love, known as attachment, or compassionate love.

虽然爱的第一阶段 可能包括了情感的剧烈起伏 和大脑活动的风云变幻， 但是通常只会持续几个月， 然后会交接给下一个 更持久的爱的阶段， 即依恋，或称为“陪伴之爱”。

 

As your relationship develops, you may feel more relaxed and committed to your partner thanks in large part to two hormones: oxytocin and vasopressin. Known as pair-bonding hormones, they signal trust, feelings of social support and attachment. In this way, romantic love is not unlike other forms of love, as these hormones also help bond families and friendships. Further, oxytocin can inhibit the release of stress hormones, which is why spending time with a loved one can feel so relaxing.

感情发生了进展， 你会更加放松、更加坚定地 对待你的伴侣， 这很大程度上来源于两种荷尔蒙： 催产素和加压素。 这两种激素成对出现， 产生信任、 互相之间的支持和依赖感。 这样，爱情就和其他形式的爱 并无二致， 因为这些荷尔蒙也会 促进亲情和友情的联结。 而且催产素也会抑制 焦虑激素的释放， 也就是为什么和爱的人 待在一起很让人放松。

 

As early love's suspension of judgment fades, it can be replaced by a more honest understanding and deeper connection. Alternatively, as your rose-colored glasses begin to lose their tint, problems in your relationship may become more evident.

爱的初期盲目消散之时， 就会由更清晰的理解 和更坚实的联结取代。 换句话说， 你的粉红泡泡破掉的时候， 这段感情中的问题 就渐渐浮现了出来。

 

No matter the reason a relationship ends, we can blame the pain that accompanies heartbreak on the brain. The distress of a breakup activates the insular cortex, a region that processes pain— both physical, like spraining your ankle, as well as social, like the feelings of rejection. As days pass, you may find yourself once again daydreaming about or craving contact with your lost partner. The drive to reach out may feel overwhelming, like an extreme hunger or thirst. When looking at photos of a former partner, heartbroken individuals again show increased activity in the VTA, the motivation and reward center that drove feelings of longing during the initial stages of the relationship. This emotional whirlwind also likely activates your body’s alarm system, the stress axis, leaving you feeling shaken and restless.

无论这段感情结束的原因是什么， 我们可以把伴随心碎的痛苦 归咎于大脑。 分手的悲痛激活了岛叶皮层， 该区域会处理痛苦信号—— 可以是身体上的， 比如脚踝崴了， 也可以是交际上的， 比如被拒绝的感觉。 随着时间的推移， 你有可能会重燃 对你前任的心心念念， 或者渴望重拾与他/她的联络。 主动联系的欲望可能会 排山倒海地向你袭来， 就像极度饥饿或者口渴。 看着前任的照片， 心碎之人的 VTA 又活跃了起来， 激励和奖赏中心 点燃了感情初期的渴望。 这场情感旋风也可能会 激活你身体的报警系统、 你的应激轴， 让你感到坐立难安。

 

As time goes on, higher cortical regions which oversee reasoning and impulse control, can pump the brakes on this distress and craving signaling. Given that these regions are still maturing and making connections through adolescence, it's no wonder that first heartbreak can feel particularly agonizing.

过了一段时间， 控制理性和冲动的高级皮质区 会缓和这份焦虑和渴望的心情。 这部分区域会在青春期 逐渐发育、建立联结， 所以第一次心碎 让人痛彻心扉也就不奇怪了。

 

Activities like exercise, spending time with friends, or even listening to your favorite song can tame this heartbreak stress response, while also triggering the release of feel good neurotransmitter dopamine. And given time and the support, most can heal and learn from even the most devastating heartbreak.

进行一些活动，如锻炼身体、 和朋友玩耍， 甚至是听你最喜欢的歌曲， 都可以缓解心碎带来的应激反应， 也可以释放更多的 快乐神经递质多巴胺。 时间和他人的支持可以 抚平心碎的悲痛欲绝， 甚至可以有所收获。

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출처 : 
https://www.ted.com/talks/shannon_odell_the_science_of_falling_in_love/transcript